People ask me how I have so much information to put on Authentic Personality. Well, I just read lots of headlines. Whatever sticks out I grab and comment on. Or maybe an article will inspire me to write something else. I have RSS feeds to different sites that I like to frequent so I can just pop down the list. There is also something that Kevin Kelly calls Consensus Websites that act as filters where the users publish links and others rate them according to their value. This adds a lot of value to the data but also represents a portal into the ‘hive mind’ of the Internet. Here is popurls.com, a site that aggregates many consensus filters into one interface. Your job is to read all the headlines, assimilate information and further classify the information in sub filters (like Authentic Personality). If you are confused as to what I am talking about, you should read Kelley’s “Out of Control” (I haven’t, but you should).

I was thinking that Christianity was a ‘worldy religion’ on the way to work. I thought for a moment that the purpose of Christianity was go get into heaven. But then my mind cleared as I remembered that Christ said that Heaven was right here. He was pointing us to our minds. Heaven is living without fretting for the future. Right here and right now, no fear, no anxiety. Knowing there is nothing to want for. Then I read this on Russelji’s blog, “What am I?”:

This world of light, this circle of brightness is the real world, where guilt meets with forgiveness. Here the world outside is seen anew, without the shadow of guilt upon it. Here is the new perception, where everything is bright and shining with innocence, washed in the waters of forgiveness, and cleansed of every evil thought you laid upon it. Here there is no attack upon the Son of God, and you are welcome. Here is your innocence, waiting to clothe you and protect you, and make you ready for the final step in the journey inward. Here are the dark and heavy garments of guilt laid by, and gently replaced by purity and love.

This ‘world of light’ is the view of equanimity. It is simple openness - as simple as can be. Heaven on Earth, so to speak.

So I am convinced to not make ‘Christianity is a wordly religion’ in my mind anymore. Such a view surely reflects a lack of insight into Christ’s meaning.

Christianity is interpretable. There is no authority on how one should relate to this gospel. The big problem is that many Christians say, ‘only my way’, even to other Christians they say, ‘you are doing it all wrong’. But this is a very limiting way of relating to the peace, love, and openess that Christ embodied. In fact such a fundamentalist view causes many problems, seemingly the antithesis of genuine qualities. I don’t think Christ came here to teach us how to be tight and fearful. I think he was a jolly, bright person with great news - ‘your faith alone can transform your world’ - the faith he taught is beyond words - only labeled, ‘faith in Christ.’ The experience of this balanced view transcends labels, however. In the clear light of direct knowing there is no Christ, no God, no Buddha, no eyes, no ears, no nose, no tounge, no body, no mind.

May we all live in equanimity free from extreme thinking.

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I am opperating right now under the influence of panic. There are no lions after me. I am not being shot at. I just don’t want to work. When we feel a strong emotion, we feel it in our bodies. Strong emotion is associated with the heart or the gut or the head. When you are angry you blow your top. Your heart breaks when you are sad. Butterflies in your belly. So I am in a sort of panic state right now - and with that there are feelings of being found out - of being revealed. Someone might see through my suit of armor and question my substantiality. So maybe in the future you will be able to get meta data about every letter you see on a page. You could right click on a letter in one of these words and a context sensitive menu would pop up and you would be able to see how much force was used to press the key. You would see that I am pressing the keys very hard because I am in a complete panic. Well, I guess its not a complete panic because I’m pretty much just feeling it in my body. I’m not pulling at my gums and kicking the doors. I did make a little whiney noise - real quiet at one point. I have that under control now. It’s nice to be able to have it out with a keyboard. It beats stripping off my clothes and running into the street. That would be a real change of pace - from “sitting at my desk fretting that I’m just not into working today” to “scraping my naked theighs as I scale cyclone fencing trying to avoid arrest”. That’s usually why I freak out, its a change of pace. I need to get some mittens for this office I work in. A lady here has hot flashes so she turns the AC down to 68 degrees.

Driving down the road with all the road goers
Mind slows down, speeds up, checks for danger
The road goes with the traffic
stretching canvas, looks like moving cars!
Or how are we to take it today?

My father went to AA where they told him that when he was at his lowest - when things were the bleakest and most confusing, that he should, ‘do the next indicated thing’. Just plan to the next indicated thing and don’t get mired down in the big picture. Like in order to not be an alchoholic today you need to brush your teeth. Like that’s it. Then when you are done brushing, do the next indicated thing. It’s actually really helpful. If you are freaking out and kind of freezing up, just move your mind to something simple. Gosh, if it’s bad enough, if you are wild enough, the next indicated thing might be, ‘breathe in’ then, ‘breathe out’. So that is pretty good advice that i think transcends freaking out. Meditation is good training to get you back to the essentials. On one level it is just that - you are sitting there, you are breathing. It is enough. In a very real way everything beyond that is utter complication. I mean, that’s why we have an idea of grace. Because this world is akward and anyone who moves through it without bashing into something is graceful. I don’t know if I would be considered graceful or not. I don’t bump into things too much or fall down too much. But my mind crashes around a lot, ungracefully. Is gracefullness only an asthetic quality?

Back to my panic, which I just forgot about. I’ll induce it again in a moment. Next indicated thing: PANIC!

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. - Jack Handy